As i mentioned briefly in yesterday's post, I have a new job! I'm really excited about this opportunity, but it is a scary change at the same time. There are a lot of factors that go into a job change, but for my husband and i the biggest reason was separation. Sounds kinda odd, more separation in a marriage, but we were both working at the same company, in similar jobs, in a really small office. Part of my job was to audit his elevator, files, and inventory..... depending on the day, that could be really fun! And I'm sure he wasn't exactly excited about those times himself.
So, over the last year we've known we would have to make a decision about jobs. Well, I moved to the Council Bluffs, Ia office in September, then moved down to the Carleton, Ne office in March and into our house in Bruning, then a wedding in June.... we've been a little busy! So finally this fall we went about talking about goals and life planning, etc... Then this opportunity came around.
In December this opportunity as a Grain Merchandiser came up 20 miles from home, just perfect. The job is with a company I've already looked at once and a great employer in the area. This is the best thing that could've happened to us. NO traveling, NO crazy hours and extended overtime, better pay, AND something that highlights my talents & skills! I'm way excited. Don't get me wrong, i really did love my old company & the people, but this was the best personal move I could've made right now.
My husband and I are both really excited. It is a chance for us to branch out, OK mostly me branching out, adding to the people we know in the area. It is a chance for us to live & breathe outside of work, and for us to maybe start building our family (not anytime real soon).
I'm excited, my husband is excited, even my former employer and mentor there is excited for me. It is great to have all this support during a time filled with so much change. Thank you everyone! And yay to me for this great opportunity!
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Holidaze...........
Why is it that everywhere you look, everywhere you turn, everything you hear during this time of year is all about having the perfect Holiday Season? I mean really, perfection? Not even possible!
I just get so irritated with the idea of perfection, how about the idea of fun, happy, & togetherness. OK, so I'm not the prime example of this because i get a little stressed about all of the holiday fuss as well, but i try. Luckily for me, my husband will remind me when I'm getting too deep! This year especially, i have been more relaxed about the holidays (possibly because i have 3 weeks off between jobs) & have been enjoying the little things like: baking cookies, making dinners, canning pumpkin butter and caramel pecan sauce.
Its funny though, i have all this time to realize how great it is when you make time for the little things, so why can't i do this all year round. I just don't know. I wish i spent more time doing these things all year round. Maybe that will be one of my New Year's promises... The other thing I've noticed is that I've grown apart from some very important people in my life: friends & family. This is pretty much all my fault... I've just not put in the time and effort. So i think that will be another New Years promise... reconnect.
The other thing I've realized through my crazy holiday break is this.... i have really high standards. I mean, its OK to have such high standards for myself, but is it fair to others. I shouldn't hold other people to such high standards, because they probably aren't attainable and then I'm just disappointed. Besides, who am i to dictate what is and isn't acceptable for others. Another New Years promise i think!
So in this madness of holiday hubbub, I've got a few things to work on for next year, but a lot to be thankful for this year. A great family, a new job, a wonderful husband, and supportive friends. I can build my home and my family, take care of the people who are important to me, and spend time enjoying life as it is now.... people always tell me to enjoy it now before there are little feet running around my house... probably a good idea.
So, I will close with this. Enjoy the Holidays, take the time to spend with family and friends. Enjoy a few cocktails and play those fun family games. Oh, and pause to soak it all in. Happy Holidays and Merry New Year! :-)
I just get so irritated with the idea of perfection, how about the idea of fun, happy, & togetherness. OK, so I'm not the prime example of this because i get a little stressed about all of the holiday fuss as well, but i try. Luckily for me, my husband will remind me when I'm getting too deep! This year especially, i have been more relaxed about the holidays (possibly because i have 3 weeks off between jobs) & have been enjoying the little things like: baking cookies, making dinners, canning pumpkin butter and caramel pecan sauce.
Its funny though, i have all this time to realize how great it is when you make time for the little things, so why can't i do this all year round. I just don't know. I wish i spent more time doing these things all year round. Maybe that will be one of my New Year's promises... The other thing I've noticed is that I've grown apart from some very important people in my life: friends & family. This is pretty much all my fault... I've just not put in the time and effort. So i think that will be another New Years promise... reconnect.
The other thing I've realized through my crazy holiday break is this.... i have really high standards. I mean, its OK to have such high standards for myself, but is it fair to others. I shouldn't hold other people to such high standards, because they probably aren't attainable and then I'm just disappointed. Besides, who am i to dictate what is and isn't acceptable for others. Another New Years promise i think!
So in this madness of holiday hubbub, I've got a few things to work on for next year, but a lot to be thankful for this year. A great family, a new job, a wonderful husband, and supportive friends. I can build my home and my family, take care of the people who are important to me, and spend time enjoying life as it is now.... people always tell me to enjoy it now before there are little feet running around my house... probably a good idea.
So, I will close with this. Enjoy the Holidays, take the time to spend with family and friends. Enjoy a few cocktails and play those fun family games. Oh, and pause to soak it all in. Happy Holidays and Merry New Year! :-)
Friday, November 18, 2011
Road Trips and the Trip Back Home
My husband and I recently completed a long tour of duty during harvest.... long hours, excessive dust and dirty work, irregular eating habits, lack of sleep, and loss of communication with the outside world. What harvest really meant was no time for anything or anyone, including each other. SO... what do you do to remedy this situation after harvest is done? Well you take a vacation! Road Trip!
Destination Santa Fe! Yup, Santa Fe, NM was the goal. We actually drove for this vacation, and it was so nice to travel at our own pace, see the country as we desired, and sing along to the radio!
*Half the fun alone in a road trip with the Ramsey's is me singing at the top of my lungs and watching my husband laugh and giggle at my ridiculousness... especially when i break out the dancing in the car too! Eventually his laughing turns into a station flip to Hair Nation and his own rendition of ACDC, Motley Crue, or some other hair banging, guitar raging, top of the lungs screaming band from the 80's. If only you could be a fly on the window in our car.... you'd either laugh so hard you cried or think we were totally nuts!
When we reached New Mexico (way up in the Northeast corner) the first thing we saw along the road was a ghost town, literally a ghost town! my first thought... "OMG, lets go back!" Well the husband said NO, and thank goodness for that because the trip across New Mexico to Santa Fe was beautiful and different from anything I'd ever seen. It always seems like when we travel somewhere new, we are reminded of somewhere we've already been. This was not really the case with New Mexico, sure if you cross the South Dakota Badlands with the Mountains of Colorado, and the barrenness of Western Oklahoma.... but that still didn't really describe the serenity & deafening silence of New Mexico, or the beauty and barrenness of New Mexico, or the vegetation and landscapes we saw. It was truly unique.
The open range and lands of New Mexico are so vast, it really made me think about how small and insignificant things can be compared to this great thing called life. Just amazing! Just the drive alone was enough to bring both of us back to life and reality, and the beauty of having life to share with someone else. It is amazing the conversations you have on a trip like this.... what do you think god wants us to do with our life, how much do you really want to stay working/living/doing what we're doing, how do you live this isolated and make a life work? I'm full of all sorts of questions and worries, my husband is very nice about playing along!
As we reached what was supposed to be civilization, somehow it still managed to look barren and deserted. How on earth does a city the size of Santa Fe manage to look like a wilderness. Well I'm sure some of it had to to with the landscape: sand, cactus, burned up vegetation, scant amounts of trees, etc.... but the other part was the buildings. These people have so much respect for their history and reverence for their land that it is almost mandatory to build in a way that is respectful to the land and culture (adobe style) as well as Eco conscious (green builds, solar panels, low profile housing). I had never seen anything like it.... so all you green loving Californians... you need to swing through New Mexico next time your Prius goes to your head!
Anyways our visit to Santa Fe really showed us what embracing a culture and lifestyle is like. From the gigantic daily farmers market, to the restaurants that support the farm to table concept, to the Native American shops and markets Santa Fe was truly a unique experience. I think some would like to think that this part of the country embraces their culture and history more than others, but I am not so blinded to see this sort of thing happening at home too. And with the thought of home in my mind, I suddenly wanted to be there...
Sure my husband and I loved our trip and all the sites and things we were able to do, but its always nice to come home. Its nice to remember what you love about the place you call home, and that is really what vacations are about. Getting away from it all to remember why you loved it in the first place. We can really get so caught up in what isn't important that we forget the great things we do have. Like, the fact that the old Oregon Trail runs right through the heart of our County, the trail that brought thousands of homesteaders, adventurers, and others being persecuted for numerous things to a new life and a new land. *Pretty stinking cool!
Plus the fact that here in the Midwest you can't turn a corner in the summer time without seeing a festival for one nationality or the other. In Nebraska alone I can think of Czech days, 2 major Irish festivals, a couple of Polish days, Danish, Norwegian, German and 2 Swedish festivals. (yup, Nebraska is highly European, not just overalls and buck teeth!). Plus we have the National 4th of July City in Seward. It doesn't get much more Historic than that... but there was William Bill Hickock who called Nebraska home for a time, and then the great Lincoln Highway criss-crossing our state bringing thousands of visitors each year, plus the birth of Arbor Day, and the inventions of Pivot Irrigation systems and Kool-Aid....
What I really mean to say is the trips we take away from home always make coming home so much better. It rejuvenates us and focuses us back on our goals for life. It brings a passion back to the things we do on a daily basis and maybe take for granted, and it reinvigorates our relationships within ourselves and with others.
It really is kind of comical in a way how the first site of a prickly cactus can excite the senses to something new, and yet the first site of a corn field can leave you longing for home. I guess you've got to get away to find your way back home sometimes.
Destination Santa Fe! Yup, Santa Fe, NM was the goal. We actually drove for this vacation, and it was so nice to travel at our own pace, see the country as we desired, and sing along to the radio!
*Half the fun alone in a road trip with the Ramsey's is me singing at the top of my lungs and watching my husband laugh and giggle at my ridiculousness... especially when i break out the dancing in the car too! Eventually his laughing turns into a station flip to Hair Nation and his own rendition of ACDC, Motley Crue, or some other hair banging, guitar raging, top of the lungs screaming band from the 80's. If only you could be a fly on the window in our car.... you'd either laugh so hard you cried or think we were totally nuts!
When we reached New Mexico (way up in the Northeast corner) the first thing we saw along the road was a ghost town, literally a ghost town! my first thought... "OMG, lets go back!" Well the husband said NO, and thank goodness for that because the trip across New Mexico to Santa Fe was beautiful and different from anything I'd ever seen. It always seems like when we travel somewhere new, we are reminded of somewhere we've already been. This was not really the case with New Mexico, sure if you cross the South Dakota Badlands with the Mountains of Colorado, and the barrenness of Western Oklahoma.... but that still didn't really describe the serenity & deafening silence of New Mexico, or the beauty and barrenness of New Mexico, or the vegetation and landscapes we saw. It was truly unique.
The open range and lands of New Mexico are so vast, it really made me think about how small and insignificant things can be compared to this great thing called life. Just amazing! Just the drive alone was enough to bring both of us back to life and reality, and the beauty of having life to share with someone else. It is amazing the conversations you have on a trip like this.... what do you think god wants us to do with our life, how much do you really want to stay working/living/doing what we're doing, how do you live this isolated and make a life work? I'm full of all sorts of questions and worries, my husband is very nice about playing along!
As we reached what was supposed to be civilization, somehow it still managed to look barren and deserted. How on earth does a city the size of Santa Fe manage to look like a wilderness. Well I'm sure some of it had to to with the landscape: sand, cactus, burned up vegetation, scant amounts of trees, etc.... but the other part was the buildings. These people have so much respect for their history and reverence for their land that it is almost mandatory to build in a way that is respectful to the land and culture (adobe style) as well as Eco conscious (green builds, solar panels, low profile housing). I had never seen anything like it.... so all you green loving Californians... you need to swing through New Mexico next time your Prius goes to your head!
Anyways our visit to Santa Fe really showed us what embracing a culture and lifestyle is like. From the gigantic daily farmers market, to the restaurants that support the farm to table concept, to the Native American shops and markets Santa Fe was truly a unique experience. I think some would like to think that this part of the country embraces their culture and history more than others, but I am not so blinded to see this sort of thing happening at home too. And with the thought of home in my mind, I suddenly wanted to be there...
Sure my husband and I loved our trip and all the sites and things we were able to do, but its always nice to come home. Its nice to remember what you love about the place you call home, and that is really what vacations are about. Getting away from it all to remember why you loved it in the first place. We can really get so caught up in what isn't important that we forget the great things we do have. Like, the fact that the old Oregon Trail runs right through the heart of our County, the trail that brought thousands of homesteaders, adventurers, and others being persecuted for numerous things to a new life and a new land. *Pretty stinking cool!
Plus the fact that here in the Midwest you can't turn a corner in the summer time without seeing a festival for one nationality or the other. In Nebraska alone I can think of Czech days, 2 major Irish festivals, a couple of Polish days, Danish, Norwegian, German and 2 Swedish festivals. (yup, Nebraska is highly European, not just overalls and buck teeth!). Plus we have the National 4th of July City in Seward. It doesn't get much more Historic than that... but there was William Bill Hickock who called Nebraska home for a time, and then the great Lincoln Highway criss-crossing our state bringing thousands of visitors each year, plus the birth of Arbor Day, and the inventions of Pivot Irrigation systems and Kool-Aid....
What I really mean to say is the trips we take away from home always make coming home so much better. It rejuvenates us and focuses us back on our goals for life. It brings a passion back to the things we do on a daily basis and maybe take for granted, and it reinvigorates our relationships within ourselves and with others.
It really is kind of comical in a way how the first site of a prickly cactus can excite the senses to something new, and yet the first site of a corn field can leave you longing for home. I guess you've got to get away to find your way back home sometimes.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Too Caught Up in Busy
It has been quite some time since i sat down to type, and you would think i would have something great to write about in all this time. Sadly, i have been so busy i have forgotten most of what has happened lately. What I do know is this... being this busy, this tied up, this crazy is NOT OK!
In all the madness that is harvest, i have missed out on so many opportunities. Opportunities to build and improve my relationship with my husband. Opportunities to better myself. Opportunities to spend time doing things i enjoy, relaxing, and connecting with others. And for what have i missed all this for? For a job? To spend all my time working on the road & away from home?
In the last month, i spent approximately 15 of 20 business days away from home. What I really did was leave my husband all alone (refer to the previous blog on his personal hygiene/housekeeping habits), neglect anything that was important to myself, and forget about what is important in my life.
I highly discourage being on the road so much that you forget you're married. (OK... not literally, but i definitely wasn't working on nurturing my new marriage). When you don't take the time out for the relationship that it needs, it really starts to suffer. I was too tired when i was home to want to do anything.... anything! I was on the road so much during the week that all i wanted to do when i was home, was stay home!
I also wore myself down so much that my life in general started to suffer. I was forgetful, unmotivated, and just plain exhausted all the time. I mean... not to gross you out or anything... but i was so tired i hadn't shaved my legs in 3 weeks.... it was just WAY too much work in the shower. Seriously? its like 14-16 strokes of a razor to shave two legs... how much energy can that take? Evidently too much!
I even missed my favorite time of year... that time right when all the leaves start changing and the nights get crisp & cool. Normally i would convince my husband out on a long drive to take in the beauty of this natural phenomenon. Normally i would convince my husband to snuggle and sleep in late in those crisp cool mornings we start to have.I missed them both this year... :-( Luckily i can get the snuggling made up... but the beauty of Fall will have to wait another year.
I guess what i should really say is... getting so caught up in running around for work or a job... and forgetting to stop and smell the roses, or have a couples day with your husband is just absurd.Your job won't take care of you when you're sick, they won't comfort you when you're sad, and they most certainly won't be at your side during your last days. Even when life gets busy, remember who and what is important... remember what makes you special isn't your ability to multitask and get the job done, its the people and love you surround yourself with.
Happy Relationship Building/Strengthening!
In all the madness that is harvest, i have missed out on so many opportunities. Opportunities to build and improve my relationship with my husband. Opportunities to better myself. Opportunities to spend time doing things i enjoy, relaxing, and connecting with others. And for what have i missed all this for? For a job? To spend all my time working on the road & away from home?
In the last month, i spent approximately 15 of 20 business days away from home. What I really did was leave my husband all alone (refer to the previous blog on his personal hygiene/housekeeping habits), neglect anything that was important to myself, and forget about what is important in my life.
I highly discourage being on the road so much that you forget you're married. (OK... not literally, but i definitely wasn't working on nurturing my new marriage). When you don't take the time out for the relationship that it needs, it really starts to suffer. I was too tired when i was home to want to do anything.... anything! I was on the road so much during the week that all i wanted to do when i was home, was stay home!
I also wore myself down so much that my life in general started to suffer. I was forgetful, unmotivated, and just plain exhausted all the time. I mean... not to gross you out or anything... but i was so tired i hadn't shaved my legs in 3 weeks.... it was just WAY too much work in the shower. Seriously? its like 14-16 strokes of a razor to shave two legs... how much energy can that take? Evidently too much!
I even missed my favorite time of year... that time right when all the leaves start changing and the nights get crisp & cool. Normally i would convince my husband out on a long drive to take in the beauty of this natural phenomenon. Normally i would convince my husband to snuggle and sleep in late in those crisp cool mornings we start to have.I missed them both this year... :-( Luckily i can get the snuggling made up... but the beauty of Fall will have to wait another year.
I guess what i should really say is... getting so caught up in running around for work or a job... and forgetting to stop and smell the roses, or have a couples day with your husband is just absurd.Your job won't take care of you when you're sick, they won't comfort you when you're sad, and they most certainly won't be at your side during your last days. Even when life gets busy, remember who and what is important... remember what makes you special isn't your ability to multitask and get the job done, its the people and love you surround yourself with.
Happy Relationship Building/Strengthening!
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
the J word: Jealous
Have you heard of the 7 deadly sins? Well, this should be one of them, Jealousy!
Jealousy: a secondary emotion and typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something that the person values, particularly in reference to a human connection. Jealousy often consists of a combination of presenting emotions such as anger, sadness, resentment and disgust.
I am sure that all of us experience jealousy at some point in our lives, but the last few years I have seen things that I can't believe. Jealousy from myself and others, over the most ridiculous things ever!
One such thing happened this last weekend. I caught up with two of my favorite gals this last weekend. One of my single & free gals, and one of my new mommy gals. It was wonderful to see them both, and funny to see how much we have all changed and stayed the same all at once. What was odd was this weird jealousy thing that i kept feeling.
Lets start with my single gal pal... how lucky is she? Still able to roam free, go where she wants, do what she wants... play on the jungle gym even (ha ha!). Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, but there are days that I wish what I decided only affected me...that if i wanted to wake up and drive home for the weekend I wouldn't have to worry about what my husband thought or had planned. I could spend my money on new shoes or purses without thinking "I should save this money for house projects". Nope, not anymore.... every time I pick up a new pair of shoes i see my Husband's face looking like "Really, another pair? Isn't 30 enough?" He means well i guess, I do end up saving money. But I am jealous of her freedom... her ability to do whatever she wants at her own whim.
What's funny about me being jealous of my single friend, is that as we catch up at dinner she is telling me how much she wishes she was settled and married. Believe me, this is nothing to be jealous of.... I tell her its a lot of work & she gets all dreamy eyed. I tell her that now I know all my husband's gross secrets... does she really want to marry someone that could wake her up in the middle of the night with a fart?? (love you dear, but really?? really??)
In the same day I also spent time with my mommy gal pal, and it was awesome. This, the once crazy and wild gal who helped me get into so many crazy situations, is now a devoted and loving mother. Its amazing! You can literally feel the love just being in the same room as her. She has the sweetest baby AND he likes me! As he napped on my chest that afternoon I couldn't help but envy her, not jealous, but envious. Knowing that some day I will have that, but I will have to wait so I enjoyed the occasion while I could. Her sister on the other hand has turned everything positive and beautiful about this special little guy into a competition.
It was repulsive how someone older, wiser, and a more experienced mother (two kids of her own) could display such jealous behavior. Everything was a one up situation. Nothing my friend did was good enough or right in her eyes. Where is the sisterly love? Where is the sisterly guidance? Where is the sisterly camaraderie about the gross baby stuff nobody tells you? It was so sad to see this ugliness totally ruining a huge opportunity to bond & share in such a wonderful moment. I was revelling in the opportunity & envious, but the one who should have been sharing the moment was blinded by jealousy.
Such an odd weekend... so many emotions tied up into such a short time. It really balanced me though, gave me some perspective on the great things in my life. It is really easy to get sidetracked in what is important in life, but it just goes to show you that everyone struggles with what is important. Married girls want to be single for a day, single girls want to be married. Mom's & sisters may clash, and friends want babies too when a new one comes into the world. But really, its about finding the balance between what you have & want you want in a constructive way. Its about being able to have wants and desires without getting so bogged down with jealousy that it ruins a perfectly good opportunity to share in someone else's success & happiness.
Jealousy: a secondary emotion and typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something that the person values, particularly in reference to a human connection. Jealousy often consists of a combination of presenting emotions such as anger, sadness, resentment and disgust.
I am sure that all of us experience jealousy at some point in our lives, but the last few years I have seen things that I can't believe. Jealousy from myself and others, over the most ridiculous things ever!
One such thing happened this last weekend. I caught up with two of my favorite gals this last weekend. One of my single & free gals, and one of my new mommy gals. It was wonderful to see them both, and funny to see how much we have all changed and stayed the same all at once. What was odd was this weird jealousy thing that i kept feeling.
Lets start with my single gal pal... how lucky is she? Still able to roam free, go where she wants, do what she wants... play on the jungle gym even (ha ha!). Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, but there are days that I wish what I decided only affected me...that if i wanted to wake up and drive home for the weekend I wouldn't have to worry about what my husband thought or had planned. I could spend my money on new shoes or purses without thinking "I should save this money for house projects". Nope, not anymore.... every time I pick up a new pair of shoes i see my Husband's face looking like "Really, another pair? Isn't 30 enough?" He means well i guess, I do end up saving money. But I am jealous of her freedom... her ability to do whatever she wants at her own whim.
What's funny about me being jealous of my single friend, is that as we catch up at dinner she is telling me how much she wishes she was settled and married. Believe me, this is nothing to be jealous of.... I tell her its a lot of work & she gets all dreamy eyed. I tell her that now I know all my husband's gross secrets... does she really want to marry someone that could wake her up in the middle of the night with a fart?? (love you dear, but really?? really??)
In the same day I also spent time with my mommy gal pal, and it was awesome. This, the once crazy and wild gal who helped me get into so many crazy situations, is now a devoted and loving mother. Its amazing! You can literally feel the love just being in the same room as her. She has the sweetest baby AND he likes me! As he napped on my chest that afternoon I couldn't help but envy her, not jealous, but envious. Knowing that some day I will have that, but I will have to wait so I enjoyed the occasion while I could. Her sister on the other hand has turned everything positive and beautiful about this special little guy into a competition.
It was repulsive how someone older, wiser, and a more experienced mother (two kids of her own) could display such jealous behavior. Everything was a one up situation. Nothing my friend did was good enough or right in her eyes. Where is the sisterly love? Where is the sisterly guidance? Where is the sisterly camaraderie about the gross baby stuff nobody tells you? It was so sad to see this ugliness totally ruining a huge opportunity to bond & share in such a wonderful moment. I was revelling in the opportunity & envious, but the one who should have been sharing the moment was blinded by jealousy.
Such an odd weekend... so many emotions tied up into such a short time. It really balanced me though, gave me some perspective on the great things in my life. It is really easy to get sidetracked in what is important in life, but it just goes to show you that everyone struggles with what is important. Married girls want to be single for a day, single girls want to be married. Mom's & sisters may clash, and friends want babies too when a new one comes into the world. But really, its about finding the balance between what you have & want you want in a constructive way. Its about being able to have wants and desires without getting so bogged down with jealousy that it ruins a perfectly good opportunity to share in someone else's success & happiness.
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